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Niba wifuza kujya murukundo dore ibintu byambere ugomba kwisuzumaho mbere y'uko urwinjiramo BISOME HANO

by Edouard Nsengiyumva 11 July. 2019 @rwandatoday 20K Views


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Urukundo benshi kuri ubu barufata nk’imikino cyangwa se wenda igihe cyahariwe kuruhura ubwonko cyangwa kwidagadura, gusa kubazi iby’urukundo bo barufata nk’umushinga umuntu atangira yamanje kwigaho ndetse yarafashe n’igihe gihagije cyo gutegura uwo mushinga. Niba wifuza kwinjira mu rukundo rero manza umenye neza niba koko wujuje ibi bintu 10 twaguteguriye.
1.Kugira intego
Urukundo rudafite intego nink’umugenzi udafite icyerekezo. Ni byiza ko wiha intego runaka y’urukundo ugiye kwinjiramo. Kumenya umukunzi ushaka uwo ariwe,icyo umushakaho,..ni ingenzi cyane. Byaba bibaje gukundana n’umusore/umukobwa imyaka igahita indi igataha nyamara nta cyerekezo runaka urukundo rwanyu ruganamo.
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2.Kugira inshuti zawe za hafi kandi wizeye
Inshuti zibamo amoko menshi. Ariko inshuti nyanshuti si ihora ikubwira ibyiza gusa. Ni igihe uyobye iragukebura ikakwereka amakosa. Mwene izi nshuti nizo ugomba kwiyegereza mbere yo kwinjira mu rukundo. Iyo hari amakosa uri gukora mu rukundo rwawe rushya cyangwa mukundana n’umuntu twakwita udashobotse nibo ba mbere babikubwira. Kutagira umuntu ukuba hafi ngo agukebure aho utari kwitwara neza bishobora gutuma ugwa mu rwobo utazapfa kwikuramo.
Baca umugani mu Kinyarwanda ngo agasozi gaterera ugatega inshuti. Igihe bizaba byazambye,mu rukundo rwawe n’umusore/umukobwa w’inshuti yawe,inshuti zawe nizo ziba zigomba kugufasha kuva muri ibyo bibazo ndetse no kugira inama zifatika. Mu buzima ntawigira kandi nta n’umugabo umwe.
3.Kumenya icyo urukundo aricyo
Kwinjira mu rukundo utazi aho biva n’aho bigana,biba bigoye kumemya uko witwara mu mubano mushya uba ugiye kwinjiramo. Kwibwira ko mu rukundo habamo ibyiza gusa ni ukwihenda. Ugomba kumenya ko hari n’igihe bitagenda uko wabiteganyaga. Guhemuka/guhemukirwa nabyo bibamo.
4.Kwemera ko mwatandukanye
Wigeze gukundana n’umusore/umukobwa ariko nyuma bitewe n’impamvu runaka,muratandukana. Ni byiza ko ubanza kumwikuramo burundu mbere y’uko utangira urukundo rushyashya. Gutandukana n’umukuzi wawe birababaza ariko si naryo herezo ry’isi. Ntibigukuraho igikundiro n’amarangamutima yawe.
Numenyera guhora uteze amaboko uziga kwikemurira ibibazo ryari?Iteka se muzahorana cyangwa uzahorana umukunzi ugukemurira buri kabazo?

5.Wikwijira mu rukundo kuko ubihatirijwe,urebeye ku bandi,..
Ingendo y’undi iravuna. Gutangira gukundana ngo kuko wabonye na kanaka abikora ni ikosa rikomeye. Banza utekereze neza niba ibyo ugiye kwinjiramo ubizi koko. Guhatirizwa gukunda/gukundwa bitewe n’umuryango wawe,inshuti se,..bishobora kukugiraho ingaruka mbi. Kuko uba ubigiyemo kubera igitutu ,iyo uhuye n’ikibazo mu rukundo,ukomereka kurusha uko ari wowe ubwawe waba ubyiyinjijemo.
6.Kwimenya
Kwimenya ni cyo kintu cy’ibanze ugomba kuba wujuje kugira ngo ubashe kwinjira mu rukundo. Kumenya imiterere n’imitekerere yawe ni cyo cy’ibanze mbere y’uko utangira gukunda/gukundwa. Ntibyakorohera kumenya abandi ,nawe ubwawe utiyizi.
Kuba ugiye kongera gukunda/gukundwa si igihe cyo kwihimura.Mugenzi(umukunzi waawe mushya) nta ruhare na ruto yagize mu kuba warahemukiwe.
7.Kutitiranya urukundo ni ihahiro
Mu rukundo si aho uba ugiye kubonera umutungo uruseho kuwo ufite. Abakobwa cyane kuko aribo bagira iyi ngeso,bakunda kwitiranya urukundo ni ihahiro. Ihariro nshaka kuvuga ni aho gusoroma amafaranga n’ubutunzi. Mbere yo kwinjira mu rukundo ugomba kumenya kubaho ntawe ukubeshejeho. Iyo winjiye mu rukundo ushingiye ku wundi muntu,uzabibona ariko nawe akagukoresha icyo ashaka. Ukaba uhindutse igikoresho cye aho kuba umukunzi we. Kuba mukundana n’umusore si ukumutura buri kabazo kose. Agera aho akumva ko ariwe ukugize ,agaciro yaguhaga kakagabanuka.
8.Kugira icyizere
Niba nawe ubwawe nta cyizere wigirira ,biragoye ko umukobwa/umusore mukundana akikugirira. Niba utiyizera ,ntiwamenya uko wizere mugenzi wawe. Icyizere niryo shingiro ry’urukundo.
9. Igihe
Kugaragariza urukundo mugenzi wawe bisaba ko ugira igihe cyawe wigomwa. Kumenya neza umukunzi wawe,bisaba igihe. Iteka mu rukundo hari igihe umukunzi wawe aba atagenzwa na kamwe. Kumenya niba koko icyo akwifuzaho ari urukundo nabyo bisaba igihe. Si byiza guhita witanga cyangwa wimariramo umukunzi wawe utaramumenya wese ngo umenye n’icyo agamije mu rukundo rwanyu.
10.Ba uwo uri we
Abantu aho bava bakagera baba batandukanye muri byinshi. Uburyo bwo gukunda nabwo ni uko. Ntugomba gushaka gukunda/gukundwa nk’uko ubibona ku bandi. Wikwigana ingendo y’undi kuko iravuna . Ba uwo uriwe mu kugaragariza amarangamutima yawe umukunzi wawe.

Niba wifuza kugisha inama abakunzi bacu twandikire kuri whatsapp nimero 0722903039

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